Motherhood, Actually

In the blogosphere, I don’t talk about my family often. In fact, at events, people are often astounded when I tell them that I have three kids between the ages of five and ten. Motherhood is easily the most important element of my sense of self as an adult. It requires a Herculean amount of effort to do the job as well as I want to, daily, without any breaks - which is not a thinly veiled attempt to garner any praise or credit, but simply the truth - and I put my heart and soul into it. I think all mothers do.

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There’s quite a movement in social media to be more “real” about things. Here I am without any makeup! Here are my untouched stretch marks! Look at my messy, unstaged kitchen! It doesn’t resonate with me at all. On one hand, it feels very much born out of vanity, or worse, insecurity. Who are all of these people that need so much external validation for who they are or the life they are living? It’s often couched in terms of relatability, but in all earnestness, who among us doesn’t know that everyone has a highlight reel as well as a daily life that is far less glamorous?

I’m here for a healthy dose of escapism, and I’d like to think that I can be pretty authentic and relatable while I’m at it. I get to see my messy kitchen every morning and it’s really not worth sharing. I’d rather spend time discussing what’s on my mind.

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Some day, my kids will grow up and they will live their own lives. They won’t need me as intensely as they do right now. I’ll do more yoga, and my kitchen won’t be perpetually messy. My life will probably always revolve around them.  And my blog probably always will not. But here they are today taking the online spotlight briefly, because I love them powerfully and cannot imagine life without the richness, depth, and intensity they represent.

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Thanks for reading! Happy Sunday.


Photos by Bryant Truong

On me: Reformation dress // On Sergio: Banana Republic slacks and shirt // On Amanda: J.Crew dress (similar) // On Ruby: J.Crew dress (last season) // On Romeo: Gap jeans and J.Crew shirt