I thought that as I got older, I would get less impulsive. But the joke is on me! I’m as impulsive as ever. I love the thrill of impulsivity. Except I am not really impulsive in the classic sense. I’m not going home from the bar with strangers and buying cars I won’t want in the long run. I like to mull internally for ages and then act quickly once I’ve figured out what I want. Maybe I’m actually not impulsive at all. I’m the opposite of impulsive.
I really dislike opinions from other people when I make big decisions. So much of that type of feedback is personal - what works or makes sense for one person’s unique variables can hardly be applied to someone else’s life. I get the idea of shared wisdom. Like, hey, I did that thing you’re about to do, and here’s how it went for me. But that is different from what I’m talking about.
So what is it I really find thrilling, then, if I am not actually being impulsive? I think I like the way it feels to freely make my own decisions. If I keep my ideas locked up in my thoughts while I sort through them, and then spring into action once I have everything figured out, wheee! Nobody can stop me! What I actually love is independence.
By the way, if my husband wrote a counter post on this topic we would get an entirely different opinion about my decision making process.
Thanks for reading! Happy Sunday. Now go watch the one team try to score points while simultaneously preventing the other team from scoring points.
L’ecole des Femmes motosuit // Coach shoes (old)